JV'S KILLER POKER:
WELL, THAT HAPPENS

BY: John Vorhaus

You're dealt pocket kings and get all raisy-crazy, only to face an ace on the flop. Well, that happens.

You flop middle set and get meatgrindered by set-over-set. Well, that happens.

Your A-2 Omaha/8 holding goes down in counterfeit flames when the river comes deuce to kill your low. Well, that happens.

Your nut straight dies an agonizing death at the hands of a runner-runner flush draw. Well, that happens.

Bad outcomes happen to everyone every day. The question is not, How can I avoid bad outcomes, for bad outcomes are inevitable. The question is, What do I do about it now? These days mostly I just say, "Well, that happens," and let the words be my mantra, my way back to the path of right action.

Take those pocket kings. Sure, they're a terrific hand -- but no longer terrific when an ace hits the board and there's suddenly a whole lot of betting going on. If you're holding those kings at that point, you've got two choices. You can curse the unfair unfairness of it all, pretend the ace is not an ace, and let your own pocket kings plunder your stack; alternatively, you can say, "Well, that happens," make the fold you know you have to make, and glide on into the future with tranquility and grace.

Are you capable of saying, "Well, that happens?" Many players think they are, but they're not. They pay lip-service to the idea of tranquility, but they don't really have it. When a foe draws thin and gets there against them, they know enough to say, "Nice hand, sir," and keep their anger and resentment well hidden. Well, there's a world of difference between keeping your anger hidden and not having any anger at all. When you can bet top pair, top kicker into some yahoo who catches a three-outer to bottom two pair to beat you, and genuinely feel no pain, then you have achieved the true equanimity of "Well, that happens."

People get so bent out of shape when they lose. They get caught up in a negative-feedback loop of bad outcomes generating bad outlook begetting bad play and leading to bad outcomes. They put themselves on tilt by not being able to take setbacks in stride. We love playing against these people because we know that they are our secret allies in the conspiracy of their own destruction. But it's vital that we not let ourselves get similarly bent out of shape. It's crucial that we stay in shape. "Well, that happens" helps with that. "Well, that happens" trains us to push past the past.

So how do you acquire this mindset? How do you manifest not just the appearance of tranquility but the fact of it as well? First, acknowledge that the anger is there. Acknowledge that you hate the bad beat, and resent the suck-out artist, and revile the dangblasted dealer who seems to give everyone the cards they need but you. Don't pretend these feelings don't exist; they exist in all of us, save the Buddha (and even Buddha had his bad days). Accept that your play is colored by emotions. This is the first step toward neutralizing the toxic effect those emotions can have.

Next, practice an alternate strategy. For me this meant writing the words, "Well, that happens" on a business card and placing it behind my stack of chips. Every time I looked down, there it was, reminding me that the road to perfect poker, at least in an attitudinal sense, was really only three words long. I started saying it out loud. No matter how big the pot nor how bad the beat, I required of myself to say only and exactly, "Well, that happens." At first I didn't believe it, just as we don't really feel it in our soul when we say, "Nice hand, sir."

I knew that I hadn't fundamentally changed, but I allowed myself the patience to change. I let the attitude shift come by slow degrees. I knew that my temper and my righteous indignation wouldn't magically vanish overnight. But I kept at it. I kept saying and thinking and trying to believe, "Well, that happens," until eventually the phrase, and the attendant emotional state, became part of my nature. Somewhere along the line I left my angry old self behind and became a person who no longer struggled to take bad beats in stride.

Eventually I didn't even see them as bad beats. I began to see them as an exciting opportunity to practice my well, that happens mindset. This is perverse, I know: rooting for bad beats just so I can prove to myself that bad beats beat on me no more. But you know what? It helped, and it helps. Now I can authentically say, "Well, that happens," and mean it, and move on.

Maybe "Well, that happens" aren't words that resonate on your frequency. Okay, fine: What strategy can you cook up to defeat the enemy of your own emotion? It may be some different useful words written on a business card, or some cold water on your face, or a timely phone call to a friend. Whatever your strategy is, I encourage you to take the time to think one up because poker only seems to be about cards and odds and bets and pots. It's really about head and heart and fortitude and spirit. Above all, it's about tranquility. Dial that in, and everything else pretty much takes care of itself.

(John Vorhaus is author of the KILLER POKER series and News Ambassador for UltimateBet.com.)